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  • JL Nash

“Juggling in the Crematorium”

I've completed a 6 week fitness plan. Yes, I've completed the plan. I haven't actually completed the first workout yet.I can see it's only twenty minutes long and it says it burns 150 calories. I wonder whether it's worth it. I am famously allergic to exercise apart from walking the dog and using my arms and hands to write, paint and play musical instruments. Not quite an introverted sloth, I am quick. I move too quickly causing me to once earn the nickname 'Crash'. No explanation needed. Now that I've completed the planning and the first workout is on my screen there is a good chance it might get done. If hubster was here he'd probably lay down a red carpet strewn with rose petals to encourage me.


This afternoon I groaned repeatedly as a particular advert was aired numerous times for Prince Harry's newest tell-all interview. I am so over this. What kind of adult disrespects his family in public? Make a joke about your background, why not, but therapy exists for resolution. Perhaps he isn't interested in resolution and his priorities are more about financial contribution. SIlly me.


My own good mental health is my priority. It should be for everyone. If the brain is not well, everything around it falls apart. Grief is causing me some existential angst at the moment but it's a process and a healthy response to loss.


In one of my writing groups this morning, we spoke briefly of goal setting for our writing for 2023. I have mine and I've already worked backwards from September to make time to complete my novella. A new novel in November and five poetry contests as write-ins to help me produce some first drafts . Why am I not working on any of my 7 novels all of which have passed first draft and some passed second draft stages? I received some excellent advice from an author. She said to me that each novel I write teaches me more about the process and I will be honing my voice, my style and output. I liked this and decided not to flog dead horses but to jump in to November with another one of my stories-in-waiting. I will prep it in October. This gives me plenty of time to cogitate.


Other challenges? Play the concertina , drone flute and ukulele more often. Paint more, Write and read as much as i can and edit, edit, edit. I'm still waiting for my Penpal to be assigned. That should be fun and of course - there's the dog and hubster who need love and attention. What? You can't fit this much in? You probably have kiddlewinks who need you. We all make different decisions.

This morning I re-read some poems from my old friend Brian Patten's book Armada. I'm probably breaking copyright rules but I don't care - here is one of his most excellent poems in all its magnificence.


Juggling in the Crematorium by Brian Patten


Let's get the balance right.

No man's thoughts are heavier

than the ashes, waiting to be collected later.


Pip Pip peeps




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